It would be impossible to say that throwing out the Spanish dancers – and their related compatriots – is anything like a pleasant part of my trip up north here to see my children and grandchildren. Nope! NOTHING enjoyable about what occupies me this morning except for my hope and expectation that once THIS job is completed, I will feel better (somehow).
“Direct thy busy movements toward God…”
Now that I discovered this statement I can use it as a tool to help myself carve out a better life as I move around in time and space. Believe me when I say, “I have a LOT of busy movements!”
I would otherwise feel entirely disheartened and condemning of myself this morning.
Four-plus years ago as I was coming along in my healing out of the terrible sickness in every cell of my body from having participated in a heavy-duty chemotherapy regime that DID eradicate the aggressive breast cancer cells that were taking charge of my body so that I am still here to notice all of this five years later……
I kept myself busy with small glimmerings of hope for the future by experimenting with making things out of laminated cloth. I made earrings, tree ornaments (including the many, many Spanish dancers and an impressive collection of cats), wall plaque (thingies) – etc. – which I sent up north to my daughter to sell at some craft shows she attends.
I am now dealing with the aftermath — and as I tear apart each and every carefully created and bagged and priced little emblem of my busy movements — I try to remember it IS NOT MY FAULT my crafty creative attempts failed. I was not responsible for the fact that the materials available for me to work with did NOT, well, WORK!
Layering fabric together with double-sided iron-on interfacing, then sealing surfaces with Modge Podge and/or varnish to make then stiff and durable (so I could carefully cut, clip and shape the individual separate images) – well, it ALL remained essentially sticky – so everything now has bonded with its paper label, with parts of itself, etc. A disappointing, frustrating, aggravating FAILURE!!
It accomplishes nothing for me to continue to burden my daughter with these failed items – now I am removing and trashing everything but the little plastic bags the items were so carefully placed into with high hopes of — selling — and making at least a little bit of money — which we ALL need more of in this family!!
I am left, it seems, back exactly where I started all those years ago — and what do I have to show for this??
OK. So if directing my busy movements toward God matters — then it is my effort, and most of all my INTENTIONS toward goodness that I offer as some kind of gift back to the One Who made me that truly matters, and not the material results no matter how successful OR how flawed these turned out to be.
What a concept!!! I need this concept right now because there are literally HUNDREDS of various little material objects created as a result of my busy movements that I am still dismantling this morning. I could throw the entire hopeless mess into the trash — but NOPE! By golly, I am going to rescue these clear little bags — why?
No doubt so I can make something else in the future with my busy movements — and — Tell me again, how and when does this process end?
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