++++

letter from grandma to mother

Friday December 6, 1963

Dear Mildred:

My what changes are going on up there.  I’m so very glad that the weather has permitted you to do so much.  Stop long enough to draw one of your plan – or pictures of the house now.  Since you’ve taken the old trailer away I can’t quite visualize the new kitchen and new windows.  Where are desk and bookcases etc.

How warm were you early A.M. on those 20 below zero mornings?  Thank goodness it was really “hot” (20 above) the day Bill got the moose.  Just wonderful.  What luck that he went back for the gun.  Lots of excitement for all, but John in particular.  I’m really truly thrilled about it all.

What are you driving up and down the hill?  Did they fix new jeep O.K.?  You probably think you’ve told me – but I wonder how many trips up and down ;you have to make now.  (By the way did you ever get box of flowers?)

But best of all, Mil will be the Light Plant.  Lights for Christmas.  I’ll pack the small box of Xmas things and mail them Air Mail on Monday.  They are very light weight.  Sent you most of them last year – and will send rest now.  I have absolutely no desire to have a tree with ornaments.  I’ve had my trees and loved every one of them when I had them.

No one seems to have Xmas sheer or spirit here.  What about up there?   Haggerty’s…were overloaded with girls – and very few customers.  The store apologized.  Said they thought it was Kennedy’s death had spread gloom everywhere and delayed Xmas spirit.  I think it’s been such warm weather, high prices, and uncertain business conditions around here.

I judge this from my own business.  There’s not much of it – and slow paying for what they get.  Won’t do much now until after Xmas either which leads me to beg for a check from YOU – this time, Mil.  I hate to!!

It made me laugh when you complained because I was writing letters trying to bolster your spirits and told me not to.  I told you in return I try to talk to myself that way – but I’d stop.

In the beginning, before Howard’s first letter about the actual “inheritance” you rendered that nice detailed letter about accounts.  I was worried to death for fear you’d need it to move or for house etc. – so said – “Later on – I’ll mange.”  Then after you got the “inheritance” I thought you’d take my hints about not getting money in etc. and send me something on summer bill, Mil.  Seems you had ideas of your own too, I know.  You didn’t have to share any of his money with me.  Of course I mean you take a little from Bill’s earnings.  I’d die if I had any of other’s!  Fifty or a hundred.

But here is Facts of Matters.  I need $100 badly, Mill.  People must think because I am alone – they can pay me “later” like doctors and dentists.  I know why they are the way they are, Mil.

Well – I’ve been too cocky and optimistic.  My business started in O.K. But I had to catch up with myself.  I still owe $75 on the $190 telephone bill – plus regular bills, including “this thing” that makes me call on you.

Medical bills and possibly the HOSPITAL before next week is over.  Like you I “get it back” after bill is $100 for doctors and medicine etc. BUT

The Hospital demands a deposit of $100 before you can get in.  And my hospitalization is paid after my bills are paid and sent to company.

I might have known better than to say I was O.K. when I was down so low.  That’s my phobia.  I have always tried to keep at least $200 in bank for Emergency Fund for you or for me.

Now my foot won’t heal and may be blood poisoning going on – I took good care of it – myself – too long.  Three weeks since I cut darn foot.  Began to worry for fear piece of glass in it so went to Dr. Norwood last Wednesday.  As soon as he saw it he sent me to a surgeon.  My feet were swollen and he said that I had to go to bed for a month with the foot.  I told him “NO” but I’d try to keep it “up” as much as possible.  Had to return to-day.  Says it won’t heal because of the water in my foot – so I’m in bed writing this – and being GOOD – so it will heal.  It must because of the cash and money angles worry me!

Norwood has given me medicine to-day to drain off water – we hope.  I told you all this in last letter, I think – except about money.

If you have tied everything up, I can borrow from Mary Cherry.  I paid her at once that other time and she and George said “Any time again.”

Charlie would give it at once but there’d by [sic] an explanation called for so I want to get back on even keel again by myself.  Haven’t spent an extra dime.  You see what happened to me.  I took off July and gave all my work to another tutor for that three weeks when I had hoped to be driving down with you.  And August is a “bad month” for me with people going away etc.  Plus the loan to you – just drained the little extra I had.

Oh, Mil, I’m so sorry.  I feel marvelous when I have it to loan to you.  But now I want to cry my eyes out because I have to ask for some back again.

You didn’t have to worry about Howard’s money – I don’t want to touch THAT.  If and when the alimony comes I’ll spend most of that starting off to pay my Eastern Man – before I die!  (unless FATE taps me NOW.)  Any old time is O.K. with me IF I get these few debts paid.  But I’ve been really “ILL” since we hit rock-bottom in New Mexico.  It’s one thing for me – but something else with the children and you to be short of money!!

Now remember I can get it from Mary and George – if I have to.  Pleae tell me the truth:  how it will affect you all!

It I didn’t have these darned sudden doctor bills!  Had just paid off “last” with Norwood and NOW again.  Well, I won’t care if I can walk and earn.

If you need more later – when I get straight on $$ — O.K.

Thankful I got a few presents before all this happened.  And will send them Mon. or Tues. or as soon as I can get out again in case I have to go – Don’t worry – This surgeon is excellent.

What trouble – all because I wanted to polish my desk and clean the glass top in the morning!  Wish I’d left it cloudy.

Does leg hurt?  Yes indeed.  I couldn’t get along without pain pills.  Should have had few stitches in beginning.  Took me back to night with your thumb at Hudson, Mill.  Don’t wait on going to doctor.  I’ll pay more in end now – plus pains.  Had antibiotics helped though.  Now I’ll be good.

Sorry.  Darn it all.

Now you know why I don’t write cheery, newsy letters? –

Love and kisses.  If my alimony comes I may be able to get along – but Hospital won’t wait.  Pray I won’t have to go!  Love — Mom

++++